When you go to parties, do you ever get the feeling that the other guests find you boring? If so, here are eight signs that the person you're talking to is bored out of their mind:

#1.) Perfunctory responses: When a person is engaged, they'll give specific responses and ask follow-up questions. But when they're bored, they'll only give perfunctory responses like, "Oh really," and "Wow."

#2.) Simple questions: If you're talking to someone, and they only ask you the simplest, most basic follow-up questions, chances are they're asking them out of politeness, NOT curiosity.

#3.) Interruptions: Do I really need to explain how someone's constant interruptions could be a sign that they're bored with you? I didn't think so.

#4.) Clarification: If you've been gabbing away for 15 minutes and nobody has asked you to clarify or elaborate on even a single talking point, it's a pretty clear sign they're bored with you.

#5.) Monopolizing the conversation: If you're the only person in the group that's talking, there's a good chance the only person that's not bored with you is you.

#6.) Abrupt changes of topic: When someone abruptly switches the topic of conversation, it's not because they were so interested in what you were saying that they wanted to save some for later. It's because they're bored with the topic and with you.

#7.) Body position: When someone's really interested in you, their body will be turned to face you. If they're turned even slightly away from you, it's probably because they think you're a total snooze-fest.

#8.) Posture: Studies have shown that when people are bored, they tend to slouch, lean and fidget more than when they're genuinely interested.

(Psychology Today)

As Winter seems to be starting here in Ontario it makes me wish I lived somewhere warmer. I know Toronto compared to much the rest of Canada doesn't get as cold or not even close to as much snow it still make me become more of a home body because of it.

Yes the snow is pretty to look at and tends to seem awesome to people who don't get it much but when it's here for at least 4 to 5 months a year it isn't so pretty anymore when it makes driving anywhere take hours longer. I do wonder what what snow removal is going to be like this year with budget cuts.

Yes Canada is known as the Great White North but it doesn't mean I have to like it.

I think for me the reason why I do not like winter so much is because I get cold quite easily.

It's currently 4 °C ( 38°F ) outside my building right now and that's too cold for my liking.

I really wish I could be a snow bird and go south for the Winter... that would rock I think

I remember an advertisement she did for the American wool growers association...talking about how in summer, she loved to have have fine merino sweater, cause sometimes those nights get "downrahght chillllii"
(you'd have to hear her say it...). Her voice was like warm honey drizzled over lemon ice-cream...

Well today, it is DOWNRIGHT CHILLY in Portland. I am wearing a t-shirt, thermal shirt, medium wool sweater, heavy wool vest, barn jacket, scarf and hat along with my jeans and thermal boots (I hate long-johns and will only wear them as a last resort).

It's too bright and sunny outside to enjoy my favorite Christmas song: River, by Joni Mitchell.
It's more of a Dar Williams "Christians and the Pagans" X-mas song kind of day: A chipper, cheerful song about lesbian pagans enjoying the holiday with a kind if somewhat conservative Christian uncle's family.

It doesn't feel like December or Christmas approaching yet, for some reason. I caught myself singing along with the barn radio: Michael Buble` on some Christmas song, to try to get a little more spirit... and when I stopped, I looked up to find barnmates crowding the front of the stall I was cleaning, all looking very shocked. Quote one younger person, "I had NO IDEA you could sing like that! It's like finding out the garbage man sings OPERA!" Kind of an odd compliment, but I got the jist.

I don't think Christmas is coming this year. Not for me.

This is how far behind the times I am: I've been watching Project Runway Season 4 on DVD. That's the season that Christian Siriano won. I've never seen the final episode/fashion shows... I think happened about the same time that my computer went on the fritz and I got my "new" (9 year old) Powerbook G4, which won't smoothly play most Youtube video. Anyhoo, working on finishing a MAJOR reconstruction of an aran sweater for a client. I tried a new method with my serger, but discovered that the old way of stitching with the sewing machine first, cutting, and then serging, and handsewing the hem is still the best and most reliable. It's slower, but NOT as slow as having to rip out a serged seam when it hasn't lined up perfectly... as is usual in heavy handknits. I also discovered that the sweater I am retailoring has quite a few pattern errors, which makes taking it in a bit challenging. You want the sides to symmetrically match, and if the original knitting didn't, well...I'm not a miracle worker. I did think to document the sweater errors BEFOREHAND so the client can't accuse me of screwing up the retailoring.

I had something nice happen: a client was so overjoyed with my sweater repair on some dye damage (the red in a X-mas sweater ran and dyed white snowflakes pink) that she instantly brought out another sweater that she wanted retailored to make it more current. (Puffed sleeves being a little passe`.) The sweater, about 20 years old, was brilliantly made out of impeccable yarn, and the most wear on it shows on the label...Let this be a lesson: Buy quality, and it will last and last. The yarn, a silk/wool tweed is one that we used to sell when I worked at Depth of Field in MPLS in 89. It was FEROCIOUSLY EXPENSIVE then, and we all coveted the rich jewel-like colours. It's like seeing an old friend, seeing it in this sweater, and I'm quite cheered how well it's worn.

Got a call back from the yarn company owner. We'll be scheduling a meeting to go over possible patterns using their yarns. I'm VERY CHUFFED! This is a great opportunity for me.

Just a quick note this morning, reposting a couple of current-events photos. You've probably seen these a dozen times already unless you've been living under an Internet rock for the last few days ... but they both made me smile enough that I wanted to add them to the journal.

The top photo is from a recent encounter at Syracuse University, and the second one is from another encounter at Yale.

I am muddled.

I had a great morning. Zee picked me up and off we went to do her Christmas shopping and spend the day together. I ended up buying a few more stocking stuffers as well as doing some of my Dad's shopping to save him the hassle. I even managed to get my parent's birthday presents bought for January which made me feel pleased.

We had our usual fun time with each other. She wanted to have a quick lunch at Jimmy John's, which have dreadful hard wooden benches. I am old now and hate restaurants with hard cold seats.I needs me some nice soft comfy seating. Anyway, while there she snapped my pix on her cell phone and sent it to rminct,my dear dear friend Richard in Connecticut.We then called him. I am NOT a phone person, so it was a treat to talk to him. Phoning people, even dear friends is not easy for me, so I was happy she encouraged me to do it. It was so good to hear his calm friendly voice. With my recent struggles with anxiety and the ensuing depressive bits, I have not been able to focus or face making my usual travel reservations to the West Coast for winter. Talking to Richard helped really remind me of what great times, we have when we meet up and travel together which we are planning on doing again this winter. He was my wonderful companion/guide during the Bay Area portion of the trip last year, and since there is so much to see and do in the area, we are going to meet up again and explore together again this year.

Being with a gay guy who loves plants we visited three greenhouse/florist shops which was lovely, as it was sunny but only about 25f (-4c) outside.

So, the morning was so good.

The afternoon went down hill fast with anxiety taking hold, triggered by minor physical aches and pains which then get magnified in turn by the anxiety in a vicious self feeding cycle. I get so tired of it. I get so scared of it as it can come on so quickly.I get scared of where my mind goes, the solutions I come up with, the faulty thinking the anxiety produces about the future. I get so tired.

During this latest bad bout with it all in November, I wrote and wrote on lj, trying to vent, trying to put it in perspective, sometimes just putting the worst of the fear and despair on paper so to speak and out of my head. I kept 99% of those entries for my eyes only. My therapist and I are working on some new tactics, and we have made med changes, so fingers crossed.

How can something so invisible and of no consequence, control my life so totally.. It is so humiliating compared to people who have real problems, real medical diseases, physical pains, real losses and hurts. I so often feel too too flawed to exist in the world I am suppose to inhabit.I am so blessed with my parent's, little ones, wonderful friends and family, but I don't want to hurt them. I want to give them and the world some one who is not such a self pitying, anxiety riddled mess.Someone who can help those truly suffering, truly in need. My wonderful therapist would now tell me I am suffering, my pain is real, anything that takes me to such desperate places and turns my life upside down is real. But, is it. Is it really pain.
We use a lot of Buddhist themes in my therapy, and acceptance is one of them. When will I accept my condition as valid, as real, that I do give to those in my life, and I am not just an exhaustive leech. Gods, I get so tired of it all.I am sorry to everyone for it all.

So, there we have my usual muddledness. It truly was a wonderful morning and a not so good, but hardly unusual afternoon and evening to me.I wonder what tomorrow shall bring? It can be so good, or it can be anxiety full of such hurt and terror. Muddle, muddle, muddle.....blah.

Hello, long time watcher/commenter here. It's rare that I post, but this was just too good not to post.

I've seen things like this posted in the community before, and I thought it was appropriate. Found this in Target today:


Click for larger

This Saturday's poll is one that grew out of an in-person discussion on orientation, gender stereotypes and sports ... and I think it's a fairly interesting topic. It's safe for work, but long enough that I'll put it behind a cut.

One note: I know a handful of you prefer to identify as something other than "gay" or "straight," which of course is great ... but my polls simply can't accommodate everyone's varying semantics without getting too long to be usable. So just pick the closer choice, or skip this post if you're not comfortable doing that. Anyhow ...

( The sports and sexuality poll ... )

Manuia le Kerisimasi, ma le Tausaga Fou ( Merry Christmas and Happy New Year in Samoan....the language, not the cookie.)

So I thought I'd share a story about my teaching experience that might warm a few hearts...

Has anyone (especially you fellow young, single, female teachers) had students (high school) offer to set you up with anyone? I've gotten it for years from my students.

Well last spring I finally listened to my students and accepted one of their recommendations as a facebook friend. These were students I had taught for several years. I teach at a charter school, that at the time was 6-12th grade. I had these students as 7th graders, then moved up to 8th.. to 9th.. to 10th.. to 11th.. now I had a few of them as 12th graders in my AP class. A few of them worked at a local museum under a certain supervisor they believed would be "perfect" for me.

So after much pleading, we became friends on facebook, and eventually went on a date...

Well long story short, he and I are now engaged. So, I guess this is just a story to show that your students could in fact actually set you up with the person of your dreams :-) Oh, and I guess the one student actually cried when she found out we were engaged (they are now all off at college now, this year as freshmen - but will definitely be invited to the wedding!)

Happy Holidays everyone!

Just came back up to my classroom from the office, where a former student and her mother were visiting.

Mom said, "Tell Mr. Schwitzer what you told me about that math test."

Former student said, "I got an A on the test, because I remembered that book you used to read to us about Sir Cumference."

I got a little choked up.

I haven't had a manwich is years, so I decided I was going it for lunch. I don't know what possessed me to want this for lunch but once I got it in my head, it's all I could think about. I went to the grocery store after I left tthe gym and bought everything, including pickle spears. I'm going to enjoy my day off and a good manwich.

Green Day With the 'American Idiot' Cast, '21 Guns' -- Song Premiere - Spinner

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Incredible version of "21 Guns" by Green Day and the cast of American Idiot.

I hope this musical makes it's way to Broadway soon.

I stopped by after work yesterday at Favorite Cousin's as I missed my little ones something awful. Five year old Brenjo dressed in nothing but spiderman underwear and a Santa hat insisted we play Go Fish next to the Christmas tree, which he beat me at something like 24 to 600 according to his math.All of this would have seemed funny enough but, the best part was his doing his victory dance in said attire, hands in the air, booty just a shaking and face a grinnin'. Neither James Brown or Ellen have anything on this boys dance moves.I was cracking up big time.

I also got my first Christmas present from Favorite Cousin, a stunning terrarium full of plants she was afraid of trying to keep alive until Christmas for me. It is just wonderful! Beautiful. I Later when I arrived at home,my first Christmas card of the season from my friend Wizard was in the mailbox!

Well I went out last night ... got a couple of drinks free ... yeah me. And then of course this creepy guy won't leave me alone ... touching and attempting to kiss me ... and do Derrick or Morgan do anything at first ... oh no those bitches dinna. But eventually we were around to help me out ... though the little freak followed me into the bathroom ... not cute ... not cute whatsoever.

Getting in my pants is so much more than compliments ... I loathe compliments and those false sugar words.

But I got to molest Derrick and he seemed to enjoy it ... though him being younger and a bi boy is not usually a turn on .. I was having fun dominating him.

The week is going well, very well. Mom is in good health, I am now 32 so I can stop lying about when my birthday is, and I am starting to get a little stoked for my month long sojourn to Ohio besides the whole stalker former classmate and even for all of the social activities that I have planned in the next week.

Okay there are times when I want to kill my neurotic students but that could be the alcohol talking.

Hello! I'm going to England/Denmark/France/Austria/Italy in the winter break and I have some questions about international student cards and mobile phones:

1. A lot of travel agents here in Sydney make a big deal about getting an International Student Card when you travel in order to get discounts on train fares etc. I've done a bit of googling but it's the sort of question that can only be answered from experience, so I was hoping someone here could help me - would most places in my listed countries accept a regular student card from an overseas university, or should I get the ISIC just to be safe? (Incidentally, if you've never heard of this thing/had bad experiences with it/can recommend an alternative, I'd love to hear about it as well.)

2. Since I'll be going to lots of different countries, I've been looking into getting some sort of international SIM card for my phone and was wondering if anyone has had experience with TravelSIM? (Again, alternative recommendations would be splendid as well.)


Thanks in advance, everyone! ♥

Prettige kerstdagen en een Gelukkig Nieuwjaar!

( Merry Christmas and Happy New Year in Dutch, because as the old saying goes.....if you're not Dutch you're not much.......just saying.......)


Snowed all day today but I had a pretty trippy day, let's hear it for a great therapist, helpful meds, and wonderful family and friends!

WANTED! We are looking for an English teacher for a school of English. Adequate salary, friendly environment. Perfect location in the center of Moscow. +7-916-615-13-73

Is anyone else just tired? I know we just had Thanksgiving break, but I'm just exhausted. I'm not only teaching full time, I work 2 part time jobs. (And yes, I know that in a society right now that we're in a recession, that I probably shouldn't be complaining) I need Christmas vacation .... desperately.
My students have gone a little nutty recently. I was out the Friday, Monday and Tuesday before Thanksgiving, and was back for the 1/2 day before Thanksgiving. We're going on a field trip on Monday, which I know they're excited about. They had all had a violin Christmas concert last night, and they have another concert next Friday that they're playing at the aquarium. Not to mention that Christmas itself is coming (and of course, we're counting down to that in school). So they're all excited about a lot of things and their stress levels are elevated, and their patience is wearing thin with each other, too. We're in a small school, so everyone knows everyone else, and its like a family, and all the students get along like brother and sister, taking the good with the bad in all that it encompasses. The great sympathy, empathy and tenderness that they show each other, but they have sibling rivalry fights, too.
I have very little patience left, and things that normally don't throw me off really REALLY have been. I'm finding myself doing all of those "filler" projects that are for those days that you really can't stand doing anything anymore. I've even shown them movies, which isn't something that I normally do (save for special occasions).

Is anyone else finding that this year is really draining on them?

Hey everyone,
I've got a question for you. I'm an ESOL teacher at a university, and we've got exchange programmes with foreign institutions so we need to know what the CO-OP programmes are?

Hi all

I am going study in Italy next term and I was issued my visa which I received earlier this week. The Italian Consulate here assured me twice that I have an extra 90 days of travel in the Schengen region once I leave Italy and to put down the length of my stay in Italy on my visa application (which is 70 days).

Well I've been doing my research and it seems the Consulate might be incorrect and that I only have 90 days in total including my stay in Italy. For anyone doing the math, this is 20 days left over.

Now here is where the monkey wrench comes in. The duration of my stay is only listed as 70 days, not 90, on my visa. Should I try and get an extension for the 20 days? Should I get in contact with the other embassies/consulates where I'm going to clarify the rules? I am having a hard time trying to figure out what is fiction and what is fact.

That being said I haven't made any concrete plans for travel after the program is over except to the UK and Ireland but this will really restrict where else I can go. :(

Thanks for any help you can give me!